Say No to Torsonudismo!

The sun came out briefly in London today and half the male population took their shirts off. They wandered around with their beer bellies hanging over their shorts, going about their daily business as if they were fully dressed. It’s an English trait that I’ve never understood and one, quite frankly, that alarms me. I mean, don’t these guys ever catch sight of themselves in a shop window?

It’s worse back in Sydney. With the weather being, well, better, English backpackers hardly ever have their shirts on. They wander up George Street, popping into shops and banks and restaurants, like it is a beach not the main street of a major city. Maybe I was brought up by strict manners freaks, but it strikes me as a little bit disrespectful.

That’s certainly how the Italians see it. The mayors of a number of seaside towns have decided to crack down on what they call torsonudismo and are fining anyone caught topless away from the beach. And it’s not just the Italians. When I crossed into Swaziland the immigration official refused to serve an English guy until he put his shirt on. The guy ranted and raved and accussed the official of being a jumped-up tyrant from a tin-pot country. But really, did he think an immigration official at Heathrow would have acted any differently?

If the fines don’t work I reckon someone should set up a Torsonudismo Hall of Shame web site, a place where photographs of the worst offenders are posted for all to see. Maybe then, after millions from around the world have laughed at their huge wobbly bellies, streaked with sunburn, they might think about putting their shirts back on.